Posts Tagged ‘Movies’

That Awful Ad Against Film Piracy

Posted: March 18, 2015 in Blurbs, Movies
Tags: ,

The Motion Picture Anti Film Piracy Council (MPAFPC), Motion Picture Association (MPA) and the Optical Media Board (OMB) has done it again – unleashed a god-awful infomercial that, quite frankly, I am not even sure works aside from annoying paying moviegoers.

If you somehow managed to avoid going to the theaters in recent years and are completely unaware of what I’m talking about, those organizations above, in their attempt to create public awareness regarding the anti-piracy laws, have created cringe-worthy ads such as the unfunny and irritating one featuring Wally Bayola and Jose Manalo, followed by the only slightly more bearable duo of Randy Santiago and John Estrada.

The latest ad is a long-winded action movie wannabe. At slightly less than two minutes (read: too long!), it only manages to depict how incompetent cops are at apprehending suspects, not to mention the recklessness and irresponsibility of firing a gun when it’s totally uncalled for.

Talk about sending the wrong message. What lame-ass keeps coming up with this crap?

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The High Price of Entertainment

Posted: November 25, 2012 in Movies, Music
Tags: ,

Last Friday, before going home, I passed by one of the music+video stores at the mall. I looked around, browsing their selections of DVDs, VCDs (yes, they’re still selling those) and Blu-ray discs.

Going in, I didn’t have any particular movie or album in mind. But since I was already there anyway, I might as well look for anything interesting that I might add to my library.

Displayed prominently were new movie releases in DVD format. Fancy owning the latest film on disc? It’ll cost you Php 750 at the minimum. You can opt for the “cheaper” VCD format, but aside from the decidedly lower quality, “cheap” isn’t really cheap. For regular employees, it’ll cost about a day’s salary to buy one. Maybe more.

I looked around on the old releases section, where semi-recent and not so recent movies were on display. They were cheaper, some way more, a few not by much, while others not at all. I knew from previous visits that sometimes, they would put some titles on sale, somewhere along the lines of 199 or something like 2 for 299. But those titles are B- or lower-grade movies, and for the extremely unsellable titles, you may find them valued at 99. If you know your movies, you can sometimes find a few gems in there; most of the times, though, they really are actually just garbage.

Local movie titles are even bigger offenders. Even old releases are tagged at 600 a copy. The irony is, some of the lower grade foreign movies in the bargain bin are still leagues away in entertainment value over most of these local titles.

Frustrated, I moved to the music section next. They offer a wide range of genres, with pop culture icons taking center stage. They have a “hard to find” area where selections are high up there in terms of price. I’m really not buying the “hard to find” label, and certainly not willing to pay the high premium just to listen to say, Lionel Richie.

The price tags made me back away from that area almost immediately.

To have something worth the visit to the store, I decided to check if they had any albums from a rock/alternative band I like. No such luck. Not even their “hard-to-find” section offered anything remotely similar.

So I checked the pop section instead, looking at some bands or names I may recognize.

After examining a couple albums and looking at the others on display, it was clear to me – I’m not buying anything. Those prices were really prohibitive! 450 to 550 were the going rate far as I could tell. Those albums that I looked at had a couple of songs that I think were okay; was it worth it to pay the extra hundreds in case the other 8 songs sucked?

See anything wrong here? A title/content may not be available, or if it does, either slap in some retarded marketing label such as hard-to-find or “imported” and jack the prices two- or three-times up, or just straight-out price them ridiculously high. Is this the music and movie industry’s way of convincing people not to pirate content?

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I need to find me cheaper hobbies! Smile with tongue out

This year saw a lot of great movies at the box office. Sadly, there were also a lot of craptastic ones that got released. Worse, the biggest crap that came out actually made it big. Oh, you know which one I’m talking about!

So here’s what I thought about the movies that I’ve recently seen. Not in any particular order.

Immortals

Rating: 3/5

I’ve always been fascinated by mythology. It’s an interesting glimpse of how deep the human mind and spirit really is.

The Good

The visual component of the movie is certainly appealing. Action scenes were filled with the right amount of gore and violence to qualify it as realistic enough. And certainly, with the actor who will soon be gracing the big screen as the Man of Steel, and a slew of attractive cast, there is enough eye candy for everyone.

The Not-So-Good

I don’t understand why Hollywood writers feel the need to crap on classic literature.

Case in point, this movie is about the Greek hero Theseus, battling it out with King Hyperion to save the fate of mankind and the gods.

For the uninitiated, Theseus was the founder and king of Athens, believed to be descended from Poseidon, although his father may very well be Aegus. Among his many adventures, Theseus was perhaps best known for slaying the mythical beast Minotaur, a half-man half-bull creature. More on Theseus from this Wikipedia page.

The movie is not based on that Theseus.

As is typical Hollywood style, they created their own version of Theseus. Heck, they created their own version of the Greek gods and the titans. Which might have worked – if the characters they replaced them with are not pathetic shadows of the original mythological ones.

In the movie version, Theseus is a peasant bastard borne of a peasant woman who was raped. Zeus, the supposed mighty leader of the gods has secretly watched over the hero by posing as an old man close to the mother-son.

Then, this king, Hyperion went on a bloody quest to find the Epirus bow, a weapon so deadly the gods themselves fear it. It has the power to unleash the locked up titans from the bowels of Mount Tartarus. His motivation is revenge, because the gods stood by while the king’s family suffered from a plague of sorts. King Hyperion ravaged villages and monasteries in the hopes of finding the lost artifact. Hyperion will succeed, and the Oracle has seen this.

Actually, it’s the Oracle’s fault that Hyperion will succeed. She’s foreseen future events, as oracles are wont to do. She’s been captured by Hyperion’s men when they overtook their monastery, but having three decoys around her all the time, they were safe for the time being as it was the case that if the Oracle were to be touched by men, her visions will be corrupted. She managed to escaped with Theseus, who after witnessing Hyperion slash his mother’s throat, was captured as a slave.

The Oracle again had a vision, that if Theseus embraced Hyperion, the world as they know it will end. But the bigger point is, if Hyperion got the Epirus bow in the first place, the world is gonna end anyway. So what did she do to prevent that from happening? She leads Theseus right to the Epirus bow. And of course, it ended up in Hyperion’s hands. They basically just gave Hyperion the very weapon that could destroy the world.

And the gods? Useless and pathetic supermodels perched atop a mountain high up in the air. They’re forbidden to interfere with men’s affairs so long as the titans were not involved. Of course, like teenagers, being told not to do it only makes these gods want to do it all the more. And Zeus killed one of them for defying him. Really? Gods don’t punish gods by killing them. I mean, even the titans were just locked down in an infernal mountain.

The titans? The monsters of yore are pathetic ethnic-looking men who seemed to multiply like gremlins once Hyperion released them from their cages.

Terrible story-telling, weak plot, vomit-inducing dialog, uninspired acting. That’s sounds about right.

New Year’s Eve

Rating: 2.5/5

The Good

It’s a feel-good movie, a mish-mash of characters as they go about their lives culminating in the eve of New Year’s.

The Not-so-Good

It worked somewhat on Valentine’s day, but in this one, it seemed forced. I ended up trying to play a game of who’s that actor/actress throughout the movie instead of being engaged in any of the storylines. And I am a sucker for feel-good movies!

The Adventures of Tin-tin

Rating: 3/5

The Good

The animation is quite plausible, especially with glasses and reflections.

The Not-so-Good

The title character, aside from the weird ugly boy’s face in a young adult’s body, is an uninteresting and a little annoying character. The dog’s the only character I am happy to see that’s not overly stupid, pathetic or otherwise just plain annoying.

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part I

Rating: 0/5

Yes, I managed to get myself into that situation where I had to come with. Still recovering from the nightmare of it all.

The Good

Honestly, I can’t think of any.

The BAD

Everything. I can’t talk about this movie without expletives coming out.

Bad acting, terrible directing, crap writing… All things despicable about the current state of Hollywood is embodied in this heap of excrements.

I can’t be sure, but I think they spent more than an hour just to establish those two weirdoes fornicating. This to me is just a way to ride the popularity (something I still can’t explain) of this series and cash in. Greedy bastards! They made a very long narrative out of something that could have been fine as a Short Movie! A 10-minute or less short movie to be honest.

It felt like something in me died after I watched this garbage.

We’re past halfway through 2011, and so far, we’ve had Thor and the last HP installment among the more successful releases. Transformer may be a commercial behemoth but that doesn’t make it a success in my book.

I digress. We still have a long way to go for 2011. And if the past is any indication, Hollywood still has a few games up its sleeves. So here’s a lineup of what I will be looking forward to in theaters these coming months:

CaptainAmericaCaptain America: The First Avenger
Release: July 27th
Genre: Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi, Thriller

The Plot: Sickly Steve Rogers after being deemed unfit for military service, volunteers for a top secret research project. The experiment, which enhances the peak of human perfection, aims to aid the US war efforts in the 40s. The result is Captain America, dedicated to defending America’s ideals.

Chris Evans, who you might remember as Johnny Storm/Human Torch from the Fantastic Four franchise, plays the lead role of Steve Rogers/Captain America. He does look the part and from the trailers, I think he might just be a good choice after all, regardless of the confusion playing two characters in the Marvel universe creates.

It looks like the main villain here is Johann Schmidth/Red Skull, played by Hugo Weaving. Supporting characters are Peggy Carter (Hayley Atwell), Bucky Barnes (Sebastian Stan), Iron-Man’s father Howard Stark (Dominic Cooper) and of course, Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson).

On a side note, the merchandise tie-up for this movie is already in full swing. From fast food to novelty items, you’ll see Evans’ mug as Captain A. at every turn. Collectibles maker Hot Toys already had preorders open for the official 1/6th figure.

All that remains to be seen now is how good the movie is.

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Change-UpThe Change-Up
Release: August 5th
Genre: Comedy

Plot: A married guy (Bateman) switches body with his best friend (Reynolds) in the hopes of wooing his co-worker.

Ryan Reynolds’ Green Lantern was a let-down. But that’s due mainly to a craptastic movie plot to begin with made worse by less than decent film effects, namely, awful CG animation. Jason Bateman you’ll remember is the guy who helps out Will Smith in Hancock.

I’m putting this here because it’s a comedy. I’m hoping a good comedy movie. One that ACTUALLY makes the audience laugh.

 

 

 

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PussInBootsPuss In Boots
Release: November 4th
Genre: Adventure, Animation, Comedy, Fantasy

The Plot: The movie follows Puss and his adventures as a back story before he meets the guys from Shrek.

Antonio Banderas reprises his role as Puss. Trailers for the film are already being played in theaters, but it’s still a long way to go before the release. November 4th is the US release date, so expect a few weeks delay before it hits local theaters. I couldn’t find specific dates for its Philippine release.

 

 

 

 

 

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ImmortalsImmortals
Release: November 11th
Genre: Action, Drama, Fantasy

The Plot: Greek warrior Theseus battles it out against power-mad King Hyperion who is bent on freeing the imprisoned Titans to reign chaos and destruction on both the Olympians and the entire humanity.

Henry Cavill plays the hero Theseus in this epic movie. If you don’t know who Cavill is, you might be interested to know that he’s the guy pegged to play Clark Kent/Superman in Man of Steel, set for release in 2013. Does he have what it takes? Still have my fingers crossed.

Mickey Rourke (Iron-Man’s Whiplash) plays the villainous Hyperion.

 

 

 

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SherlockHolmesAGameOfShadowsSherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows
Release: December 16th
Genre: Action, Adventure, Mystery, Thriller

The Plot: London Detective Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John H. Watson combine wits to take down their fiercest of adversaries, Professor Moriarty.

Speaking of Iron-Man, Robert Downey, Jr. is back to portraying the detective with Jude Law reprising his role as his aid Dr. Watson.

Holmes’ former adversary Irene Adler is once again played by Rachel McAdams, while Jared Harris plays Holmes’ equally-intelligent foe Prof. Moriarty.

 

 

 

 

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Other movies worth a look:

Alvin&TheChipmunksChipwreckedAlvin and the Chipmunks: Chip-Wrecked
Release: December 16th
Genre: Animation, Comedy, Fantasy, Family, Musical

 

 

 

 

RealSteel

Real Steel
Release: October 7th
Genre: Action, Drama, Sci-Fi

Plot: A story set in the near future where humanoid robot boxing is a popular sport. It follows a struggling promoter who, with his newly-discovered 11-year old son who wants to know his father, may have found a champion in a seemingly unlikely robot.

On July 22nd, expect the movie theaters to get jam-packed as this year’s most highly anticipated movie Captain America: The First Avenger opens. Reservations aside, I’m excited to see the movie after seeing the Super Bowl XLV TV Spot.

Captain America: The First Avenger

With Chris Evans playing the titular role, I would assume there’ll be plenty of skepticism to go around. Evans playing two Marvel Superheroes doesn’t exactly put people’s minds at ease. His first stint in the Marvel Universe is the Human Torch from the Fantastic Four movies.

Along with Evans, the film stars Hugo Weaving, Tommy Lee Jones, Neal McDonough, Sebastian Stan, Dominic Cooper, Hayley Atwell, Toby Jones. Direction is handled by Joe Johnston.

If the trailer isn’t enough, have your fill with these movie stills and posters.

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Hot Toys already announced they acquired the license to create the 1:6 version. I just seriously hope HT doesn’t mess up the figure, ‘cause I can’t wait to have this beside my new Iron Man 2 Mark IV figure.